“My partner isn’t sure he/she/they want to do couples therapy.”
“We really need this, but they/she/he won’t commit.”
“My partner was on board, but she/he/they aren’t interested anymore.”
“What do I do?
If you’ve found yourself asking these questions, you are in good company. This is often the first hurdle that couples have to get over to even get to therapy. Unfortunately, couples wait wayyyyyy tooooooo long before seeking therapy for their relationship issues. As in YEARS too long. What’s worse is that couples therapy is commonly slated as a “last ditch effort” when divorce or a breakup is on the line, which is also too late, as one partner of the couple relationship has likely already made up their mind about the trajectory of the relationship.
Couples therapy is like a duet–in order for the music to sound good, you need both pianists together, playing in harmony. But that begs the question, what about me?
Fortunately, couples counseling for one exists. Couples counseling for one is another way to say individual counseling. Even though your partner may not be committed to the therapeutic process yet, it doesn’t mean that you need to hold yourself back. You can come to therapy and work on refining the parts of you so you can play the music better.
Can I see a marriage counselor alone
Absolutely. It can be confusing for people to look at the different titles and descriptions of counselors and know who does what. After all, there are licensed marriage and family therapists, psychologists, licensed professional counselors, social workers, mental health counselors, and so forth. For better or for worse, these titles vary depending on the state you live in as well.
The primary differences between each of the titles is the way the professional was taught and what coursework they pursued. As a licensed marriage and family therapist, I was trained to see things in context and systemically–which is a fancy word to say “seeing how relationships and the environment work together.” I also took a number of relationship based courses focused on couples, families, and marriages. Hence the title. Think of it more as an added specialization. Although the license of a licensed marriage and family therapist implies only relationship work, the license does not preclude me from being able to treat adults or children, as long as I have the training and experience. For example, in addition to couples and families, I also work with adults experiencing anxiety, self-esteem, and trauma.
Marriage counselors can also offer a unique perspective on your situation, as many have experience working with couples. In these cases, you may benefit from more refined questions about your relationships with your partner and others as you work on addressing and improving ways that you experience and contribute to the situation.
Trauma therapist San Antonio
In short, even if your partner does not want to attend couples therapy with you, you are welcome to come and work with me. As a trained trauma therapist, I am able to help you resolve your trauma, whether past or present.
Come and work with me.
Schedule your free 15-minute consultation