What is Sexual Trauma?

Trau­mat­ic events can for­ev­er alter the course of a person’s life. When some­one expe­ri­ences sex­u­al trau­ma, the after­math can feel impos­si­ble to get through and over­come. Unfor­tu­nate­ly, sex­u­al trau­ma can hap­pen to any­one and it can hap­pen to any­one of any gen­der, age, or socioe­co­nom­ic sta­tus.

Data from the Cen­ters for Dis­ease Con­trol and Pre­ven­tion shows that 1 in 2 women and 1 in 3 men expe­ri­ence phys­i­cal sex­u­al trau­ma in their lives. Fur­ther, 25% of women and close to 4% of men expe­ri­ence attempt­ed or com­plet­ed rape and 11% of men are forced to pen­e­trate some­one in his life. [1]

Going through some­thing as trau­mat­ic as sex­u­al abuse or assault can leave scars on the psy­che long after you have healed phys­i­cal­ly. The focus of today’s blog post will explain what sex­u­al trau­ma is and, most impor­tant­ly, how to begin heal­ing men­tal­ly. Any behav­ior of a sex­u­al nature that results in a great deal of stress for the sur­vivor is defined as sex­u­al trau­ma. When this occurs, it’s with­out con­sent, or the con­sent is forced due to fear.

Sex­u­al trau­ma can also be any inten­tion­al and inap­pro­pri­ate behav­ior that gives the offend­er a form of sex­u­al grat­i­fi­ca­tion. Exam­ples include phys­i­cal behav­iors such as being touched sex­u­al­ly, being forced to do sex­u­al acts, being ver­bal­ly threat­ened or humil­i­at­ed, or forc­ing some­one to view sex­u­al­ly explic­it images. If sex­u­al trau­ma is left untreat­ed, the sur­vivor is at risk for strug­gling with the long-term effects of the event. For some, sex­u­al trau­ma can lead to chron­ic health prob­lems, anx­i­ety, depres­sion, or sub­stance abuse. In some sit­u­a­tions, behav­ioral con­se­quences can also include con­tin­u­ing the cycle of trau­ma through per­pe­trat­ing abuse.

Signs and symptoms of sexual abuse in adults

Every­one can be impact­ed by sex­u­al assault and trau­ma dif­fer­ent­ly. Some symp­toms and signs can include:

• Sleep issues, includ­ing sleep­ing more or less, night­mares, or wak­ing up fre­quent­ly.

• Dis­tanc­ing from friends and fam­i­ly.

• Poor hygiene

• Intense fear

• Lack of moti­va­tion

• Self-harm

• Want­i­ng to hide your feel­ings

• Being con­stant­ly alert or on edge

• Dif­fi­cul­ty concentrating–often in school or at work

• Increased irri­tabil­i­ty, cry­ing, or depres­sive symp­toms

• Phys­i­cal health con­di­tions relat­ed to car­dio­vas­cu­lar, gas­troin­testi­nal, gyne­co­log­i­cal, or over­all sex­u­al health

How to heal sexual trauma

Return­ing to “nor­mal” after sex­u­al trau­ma can feel chal­leng­ing or even impos­si­ble for sur­vivors of sex­u­al trau­ma. There’s no one right way to move for­ward, but the sug­ges­tions below can be a healthy and help­ful start.

Avoid rushing the recovery process

Recov­er­ing and mov­ing on after sex­u­al trau­ma, unfor­tu­nate­ly, won’t hap­pen overnight. Mov­ing past the event takes time and a lot of hard work and ther­a­py. When you par­tic­i­pate in ther­a­py, you and your clin­i­cian will cre­ate a treat­ment plans in work­ing towards recov­ery. Treat­ment plans vary from per­son to per­son, depend­ing on trau­ma sever­i­ty, his­to­ry, and sched­ul­ing needs. Despite a desire to get through the trau­ma as fast as pos­si­ble, rush­ing the heal­ing process can neg­a­tive­ly impact the abil­i­ty to recov­er.

Choose compassion over blame

It’s com­mon for trau­ma sur­vivors of any kind to blame them­selves. Sur­vivors often grap­ple with shame and self-loathing as they ques­tion what they could have done dif­fer­ent­ly to pre­vent the abuse from hap­pen­ing in the first place. Sex­u­al trau­ma sur­vivors may also unnec­es­sar­i­ly blame them­selves. Regard­less of what hap­pened, where it hap­pened, or who was involved, or what you were doing, it was and is not your fault.

Minimize substance and alcohol use

Some sex­u­al trau­ma sur­vivors may turn to sub­stances, includ­ing drugs and alco­hol, to numb the pain or to tem­porar­i­ly feel bet­ter. While this may be a short-term solu­tion, it does not take away the pain or the mem­o­ries long-term. Talk with a friend, fam­i­ly mem­ber, or ther­a­pist if you find your­self hav­ing trou­ble man­ag­ing your sub­stance use. Sep­a­rate when you take pre­scribed med­ica­tions and alco­hol to reduce the chance of harm­ful chem­i­cal inter­ac­tions. If you’re strug­gling with sub­stance abuse after trau­ma, please reach out to a health­care pro­fes­sion­al.

Develop a plan

It’s easy and com­mon to feel unsafe or uneasy after a sex­u­al trau­ma occurs. Tak­ing pre­cau­tion­ary steps such as block­ing the per­pe­tra­tor and restrict­ing access to that per­son can help. Cre­ate a plan to keep your­self safe, such as being mind­ful of your sur­round­ings, hav­ing emer­gency con­tacts, and self-safe­ty items (i.e., pep­per spray, whis­tle, phone loca­tion on). When in pub­lic, try to have a “bud­dy” who you trust.

Stay connected

While it might feel like it’s bet­ter to keep what’s hap­pened to your­self, choose a safe per­son to talk with about how you are feel­ing. This can include fam­i­ly, friends, a trust­ed teacher or pro­fes­sor, coach, or men­tor.

Seek out trauma-informed therapy

One of the most impor­tant steps to heal­ing from sex­u­al trau­ma is to reach out for sup­port through a ther­a­pist. Trau­ma is com­plex, and so can its impact be on our lives.

Reach out today to start your heal­ing jour­ney.

[1]. https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/sexualviolence/fastfact.html#:~:text=Over%20half%20of%20women%20and,penetrate%20someone%20during%20his%20lifetime.

Send me a mes­sage today!